


Sleeping on Secrets

by journalanxiety



Series: The Art of Seducing an Anxious Ball of Curls [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: And the others love him so much, Fluff, Insecure Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, M/M, Other, but they're working on it, he is a soft boy, mild angst??, romantic LAMP/CALM - Freeform, though it isn't all four of them yet, virgil has yet to be seduced lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-18
Updated: 2018-08-18
Packaged: 2019-06-27 01:41:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15675474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/journalanxiety/pseuds/journalanxiety
Summary: It’s not that Virgil’s ashamed of his hair. Hell no, it’s just… Virgil knows that the others would never take him and his suggestions seriously if he didn’t take an extra thirty minutes to an hour each morning just fixing his hair.AKA, Virgil has a head of soft, fluffy curls that he can't ever reveal to the other sides, and certainly not Thomas, because he just knows they won't take him seriously anymore. But can his secret survive a Disney movie sleepover?





	Sleeping on Secrets

**Author's Note:**

> I've used a couple more of my Virgil headcanons (other than the main one) in this because everyone must enjoy my dark son, and they include:  
> -Virgil is a smol boy. He's the shortest side  
> -When I say he wears eyeshadow, I mean full eye makeup of beauty guru level skill. he can't let Roman be the most dramatic side
> 
> btw i don't have a beta so sorry for any mistakes i am a tired mess

The shrill ringing of the alarm on Virgil’s phone drags him from his restless sleep with an exhausted groan. An unsteady hand fumbles blindly at the end table next to his bed, Virgil’s face still buried in his pile of fluffy pillows. Fingers finally closing around his phone, Virgil drags it closer, squinting at the flashing alarm. Five thirty. Not Virgil’s preferred time to be leaving the comfort of his many blankets, quilts, and duvets, but he had to if he wanted to be ready before the others were up and about. 

Stumbling his way to the bathroom, Virgil closes and locks the door behind him, flicking the lights on. The others might assume him to be most concerned with his makeup when it came to maintaining his angsty persona, but they were wrong. Sure, Virgil likes to apply a healthy coating of eyeshadow in shades of shimmering charcoal gray and dusty plum around and under his eyes to hide whatever exhaustion is present due to his poor sleeping habits, but that isn’t the most important part of Virgil’s morning routine. No, that’s the hair.

It’s not that Virgil’s ashamed of his hair. Hell no, it’s just… Virgil knows that the others would never take him and his suggestions seriously if he didn’t take an extra thirty minutes to an hour each morning just fixing his hair. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Virgil glances into the mirror to assess the damage. 

Virgil’s natural hair is a wild poof of shiny chocolate curls, winding and twisting messily about his head and around his ears. Each morning, Virgil straightens his hair, but his nightly shower combined with bedhead result in the curls returning to their jovial state by the time he wakes up. The artfully messy explosion of curls actually looks nice, in Virgil’s opinion, but he can’t risk the others not taking him seriously. Sure, they, Thomas included, have been working to be more inclusive and welcoming toward him, going out of their way to invite him to movie nights and ask for his opinion, but their relationship is still so young and fragile. Virgil can practically hear Roman’s taunts and laughter; he can practically see Logan’s unimpressed looks and Patton’s condescending smiles. No, for once, everything is looking up, and Virgil can’t risk ruining that. 

And so begins the tedious and time consuming task that is straightening out his mop of curls. Section by section, Virgil straightens out the kinks and curls from his hair. When six thirty rolls around, Virgil’s hair is carefully styled into his trademark emo bangs and he can move onto his makeup. 

Sitting up on the counter, Virgil collects some of the plum eyeshadow onto a brush when he hears soft footsteps passing by the door. He pauses glancing up to watch the door, but relaxes once more when he hears Patton’s cheerful greeting, “Good morning, kiddo! I’m going to go start the coffee downstairs, it should be ready in about ten minutes!” 

“Okay, I’ll come down as soon as I’m ready.” Virgil calls, turning back to the mirror and applying the eyeshadow with familiar and soothing movements. Just another day of life. 

  


Or not. It’s later in the day now, the afternoon sun casting warm light past the curtains and into the living room. Virgil is perched up on the kitchen counter, nursing a can of soda while messing around on his phone. Roman and Patton are giddy with the idea of having a sleepover in the commons room so they can binge watch the older cartoon disney movies together. Virgil dismisses the idea after half-listening to the excited chatter for a minute, too used to being discluded from activities with the others to really give it much thought. He had expected to be able to escape from attending, but then Logan decides to join them. 

“Yes, I think it would be an excellent way to wind down after Thomas’s rather busy and hectic week. It’s good to relax and spend time together outside of working.” Logan agrees sagely, a smile warming his face. And then they turn to look at Virgil, eyes pleading. 

Virgil pauses mid-sip, his can of soda hovering by his lips. He blinks, confused, before hesitantly asking, “Uh, what? Sorry, I wasn’t really paying attention.” He waves his phone for emphasis, desperately wishing he could burrow into the depths of his hoodie and avoid their gazes. 

Roman rolls his eyes amusedly, his hands on his hips, “Movie night, Doctor Gloom. We’re going to sleep down here with a bunch of blankets and pillows and watch a bunch of delightful Disney classics.” 

Watching them for a minute, Virgil’s eyebrows furrow in confusion, “You actually want me to join you?” 

An awkward pause follows his words, but Patton recovers fairly quickly, a soft smile on his face, “Of course! It wouldn’t be the same without you.” 

Chewing on his lower lip, Virgil thinks. He’ll have to set a quiet alarm so he can sneak away in the morning before the others have the chance to get up and see his curls. It shouldn’t be too hard, and if he sleeps on the chair rather than on the sofa near them, the alarm will be less likely to disturb them. After a minute or so of thoughtful planning, Virgil offers a small nod, returning his attention to his phone, but not before he sees Patton’s near blinding smile. Shrinking down further into his hoodie, Virgil sighs. He can do this. 

  


They start the marathon at seven-thirty after eating dinner and helping Patton with the dishes. The others are piled up on the couch, limbs splayed and curled around each other like three clingy octopi. Virgil knows that his decision to curl up alone under a warm pile of blankets on the recliner rather than cuddle with them hurt Patton, and possibly the other two, but he still isn’t used to all the attention and affection. More importantly, Virgil knows he can’t risk being trapped in a tangle of limbs come morning when he needs to escape to attend to his hair. Instead, Virgil just burrows further into his nest of blankets, his arms wrapped tightly around a cat plushie that he’s had since Thomas was little. 

Patton had insisted that Virgil get the first movie choice, despite Roman’s loud complaints and whining; although, judging from the easy grin on the creative side’s face, Virgil assumes that it’s all dramatic flare and carries no bite. And so the night starts with The Emperor’s New Groove, the majority of which Virgil spends asking Roman, _“Oh my god, is that you?”_ every time Kuzco does something dramatic or particularly stupid. Roman retaliates by exclaiming, _“Virgil! You didn’t tell me you were a Disney star!”_ every time Yzma is on screen, which causes Virgil to snicker into his blankets since he remains unwilling to give Roman the satisfaction of knowing he is highly amused by the commentary. Patton and Logan suffer through their banter until Virgil and Roman come to an agreement that Pacha is the Logan of the movie- resulting in Logan flinging popcorn at the both of them. Patton tells them all to quiet down and enjoy the movie, though his voice is warm with restrained amusement. Virgil giggles into the blanket, his eyes gleaming as they meet Roman’s across the room. 

A couple hours later, as the others bicker over what to watch next, Virgil quickly sneaks onto his phone, turning on his alarm before setting his phone down on the floor. He settles back into his pillows as the others finally decide upon Lilo and Stitch, a content sigh escaping his lips. Maybe this wasn’t such a bad idea. 

  


Roman groans, face scrunching up in annoyance as another small _ding_ sounds from across the room. Roman slowly untangles himself from Logan and Patton, squinting in the direction that the noise originated from. There, on the floor, Virgil’s phone flashes with an alert from some app. _Why didn’t he turn his phone on silent?_ It doesn’t make much sense to Roman. Ignoring the fact that they were having a sleepover, Roman can’t see why Virgil would keep his phone notifications on when he already had enough trouble sleeping. 

With slow and precise movements, Roman rises from the sofa and crosses over to kneel next to the recliner. He quickly silences the phone and returns it to its place on the floor before standing up again. Roman glances down at Virgil, afraid he may have disturbed him and half expecting to see stormy brown eyes glaring up at him, but the anxious side is burrowed underneath his blankets and hidden from view. 

Filled with a sense of relief, Roman picks his way back to his spot on the couch, dropping light kisses onto Patton’s forehead and Logan’s cheek when they stir slightly. After murmuring a couple reassuring words, the three curl up once more into a messy tangle of limbs before slipping off to sleep once more. 

  


Patton is an early riser. His internal clock seems to be wired to rise with the sun, and any time he tries to sleep in he grows antsy and restless. Despite watching movies late into the night, Patton is blinking awake at six with a wide yawn. Sitting up, he smiles at the sight of his boyfriends cuddled together. They don’t always sleep together, especially when they have to work on different projects with Thomas that require odd hours, but waking up with the two of them is always a treat that warms him to his soul. Patton glances over at the recliner, eyebrows furrowing a bit. He just wishes he knew how to wrangle Virgil into joining them. 

Patton, Logan, and Roman have all grown to adore Virgil since they came to understand him and his role as a side better. Since then, they’ve seen more and more of a shy, gentle Virgil that they were unacquainted with before. That’s not to say he isn’t a fiery ball of sass and sarcasm; no, he still has just as much bite as before, but now they see it as more playful and defensive. He’s still much more hesitant and awkward around them than Patton would like- something that they are to blame for. Still, Patton hopes that with time Virgil will open up more and grow closer to them. 

Pulling on his fluffy robe and his slippers, Patton tiptoes over to the recliner to peek at Virgil. He’s never seen the anxious side asleep before, as Virgil is always up and getting ready for the day before even Patton, a fact that always surprises him. Reaching out with a steady hand, Patton slowly draws the blankets away from Virgil’s face. And then he freezes. 

He backs up quickly, squatting down and pressing the fluffy sleeves of his robe to his face to hide his grin and wide eyes. Exhaling hard, Patton stands up again, leaning back over Virgil and he can barely contain the squeal of excitement and adoration as he rushes over to Roman and Logan, gently shaking them awake. 

Quickly shushing them before they can make too much noise, Patton waves them over to Virgil. Logan and Roman blink up at him, sharing a confused glance before stumbling over to Patton’s side. They glance at him questioningly, taking in how Patton is practically cooing while gazing down at Virgil, his eyes so bright with glee. So they look down. And promptly wake up, their jaws dropping and eyes widening. 

Virgil’s face is more relaxed than they have ever seen it as he slumbers on, unaware of their attention. There’s no dark eyeshadow dusting over and around his eyes, making him appear much younger and softer than normal. The bags under his eyes aren’t as noticeable as they expected them to be considering the amount of eyeshadow he normally wears. His nose is buried in the soft material of a worn and well-loved plushie cat. However, none of these details are what captures their attention and encourages their steadily growing excitement. 

No. That would be Virgil’s hair.

Patton reaches out a hand, fingers gently carding through the thick mass of chocolate curls, which circle around his head and face like a halo of ringlets. Patton can’t help his growing grin as Virgil leans into his hand, a soft sigh escaping him. His hair is so soft under Patton’s fingers, and he can’t help but coo at the way the ringlets almost bounce back into place. 

Roman stammers, a hand coming up to run through his own hair in his shock, “B-but his hair is straight? When… how?” 

Glancing between his boyfriends, Patton notices when Logan blinks out of his daze, eyes lighting up as he begins to solve the mystery that is Virgil’s hair. He murmurs quietly, face tilted toward Patton, though his gaze never leaves Virgil, “You’ve mentioned that Virgil is regularly up and active before you, correct?” Patton nods, glancing back down and melting all over again. “Perhaps he isn’t just doing his makeup? Maybe he wakes up early to straighten his hair?” 

“Why would he do that?” Roman looks at Logan incredulously. 

Logan opens his mouth, ready to respond, when Virgil makes a small noise. The three freeze as they turn to watch Virgil, Patton’s hand snatching back and away from Virgil’s hair. No one breathes as they watch Virgil slowly begin to stir. He groans, quietly moving to sit upright while rubbing at his eyes with the sleeves of his sweatshirt. When he notices them standing there, Virgil looks up at them, eyes tired and confused. 

Virgil’s expression slowly grows more and more panicked as he glances between the three of them. Patton takes a deep breath, planning to just laugh it off, but then Virgil stiffens. His grip on the blankets tightens, his knuckles turning white as the color bleeds from his face. And then he’s gone with the loud _crack_ that accompanies a side when they sink out and back into their room. 

  


Curled up under a mountain of blankets, Virgil stares numbly at the wall. There is no point in getting ready for the day. Not now, not ever again. They _know_. They had seen the curls. So what was the point in trying to maintain his menacing persona? 

He groans, burying his face in his hands. Knowing his luck, Roman has probably already gone and told Thomas, further spreading his embarrassment. What was the point in even getting up and out of bed anymore? He might as well just quit at this point because- 

“Virgil?” Patton’s voice tentatively calls out, muffled from behind the door. Hunching his shoulders, curling further in on himself, not bothering to respond. Patton calls out again, his voice filled with concern, “Virgil, kiddo? We’re going to come in, okay? We just want to check in on you.” 

“Yeah! And we bring cookies!” Roman cheerily announces as the door opens, his voice carrying throughout the room. Virgil doesn’t move from under his blankets, instead hoping that if he stays still enough they _might_ just leave. 

No such luck. 

He feels his bed dip as presumably Patton sits on his bed. “Virgil? Are you okay?” 

“No, now leave me alone to wallow in self-pity.” Virgil gripes. 

He hears a snort of laughter followed by a muffled thump and an indignant, _“Hey!”_ from Roman. This time it’s Logan who speaks, “Well, you’re obviously lying. Not only did you practically flee the commons room this morning, but you’ve also been lying in bed all day.” 

He hears an amused huff from Patton, “I agree with Lo. Something obviously upset you. We would really like to know what it was so that we can avoid it in the future.” He pauses, obviously waiting for Virgil to respond. Virgil doesn’t, his scowl just deepening as the ache in his chest worsens. Patton changes tactics, his hand reaching out to fiddle with the edge of one of the quilts, “We never knew you had curly hair! I was really surprised this morning when I checked on you,” Another brief pause, and then Patton continues, a little more hesitant this time, his voice small, “Why do you always straighten it?” 

The aching ball in his chest grows, tightening his throat as Virgil fights off tears. He takes a deep breath and swallows, answering quietly, “Because I knew you guys wouldn’t take me seriously.” 

“What did you say?” Logan asks, voice sounding confused, “Sorry, but you are under an impressive pile of blankets, so your voice is rather muffled.” 

Virgil sighs, rolling his eyes. “I said I straighten it because I knew you guys wouldn’t take me seriously.” His statement is met with silence, and Virgil can feel himself tensing up again. 

Surprisingly, it’s Roman who breaks the silence, “What do you mean? Why wouldn’t we take you seriously?”

Huffing with annoyance, Virgil wiggles far enough out from under his mountain of blankets so that he can glare at them. “Before, when I was just Anxiety and you guys thought I was just some annoying side that you had to find a way to work around, the only way I could get you to listen to me and my concerns was if I was intimidating,” They look a little guilty at that, but Virgil continues on before one of them can interject, “I’m already shorter than all of you, so it’s harder to accomplish a menacing appearance. If i had curly hair, _none_ of you, including Thomas, would have taken me seriously. I would have just been ignored and pushed aside and I couldn’t let that happen so…” Virgil blinks, resisting the tears building up in his eyes as he looks down at where his hands grip a blanket. 

And then suddenly he’s being pulled into a hug, securely snuggled against Patton’s chest. Patton’s arms are unyielding to his squirming, so Virgil gives in, sagging against Patton. “I’m sorry we made you feel like that, Virgil. You should never have felt so insecure and ignored that you had to hide your appearance from us.” The bed dips again as Logan and Roman sit next to them. They murmur their apologies as well, carefully enveloping Virgil in a warm hug. 

Virgil exhales shakily, a couple tears slipping down his cheeks. He snuggles further into their embrace, allowing the feeling of contentment to wash over him. 

  


A couple months later, Virgil can safely say his fears were silly. The others still take him seriously, despite the explosion of curls that is his hair. They seek his input on various matters and value his opinions. Indeed, his fears were misplaced. He should have been worried about other things. 

Yes, Virgil’s greatest fear should have been that the others would _not be able to keep their hands to themselves and out of his hair._ Apparently his hair is very, _very_ soft and tempting. More often than not, if Virgil is spending time with one of the sides, their hands will end up running through his hair.

This in itself wouldn’t be much of a problem, if Virgil didn’t practically melt at the touch _every single time._ This often results in spontaneous cuddles, no matter what they’re doing. If he and Logan are reviewing the plans for the week or reading together, he’ll end up in Logan’s lap, head against Logan’s chest as a steady hand cards through his hair. Patton loves to ruffle and play with his hair whenever he sees Virgil, even if he’s just passing by, leaving Virgil standing in a daze for a minute or two, blinking after him. Roman is perhaps the most evil, as he uses Virgil’s weakness to effectively force him to watch movies together. 

Virgil knows that they’re doing it on purpose, though he can’t figure out what their endgame is. Virgil yawns, further snuggling down in between Patton and Roman, their hands a constant presence in his curls as they settle down for a movie night. He may not know what they’re planning, but he can’t find it in himself to mind or be suspicious. Not now, when he’s feeling the most love and affection than he’s ever felt in his life. 

**Author's Note:**

> So this is my first Sanders Sides fic! Thank you for reading, I'm hoping to write more for this fandom in the future because I just adore Thomas (what a lad) and the fandom is filled with the most amazing and friendly people. 
> 
> If you liked it, please leave a kudos and a comment! You don't need to write a paragraph, a keysmash can make my day ❤
> 
> You can check out more sanders sides headcanons on my side blog --> journalanxiety.tumblr.com


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